Not Negative

I am trying to be positive this cycle. I know it's difficult, but since I have zero chance of getting pregnant without ART- I have to believe that anything we do increases our chances by a lot.
I know the signs are not exactly there.. stupid sunflower... no symptoms.. but I POAS anyway.. for the past 2 days.
I know, I know... I said I would wait until Sunday-- but apparently, my name is Nicole and I am an addict. The first one was pretty white- but I wasn't sad. I learned that if I stared at it for about 2 minutes straight I could make one of those 2nd lines appear, I just had to look at it cross eyed, without blinking at a 75 degree tilt backwards... I'm pretty good at magic, huh?

Well I did it again today.. but the slight line is there without all the tricks.. DH even saw it.. but he says it's not line enough to call it. I asked him to pick up the good brand, FRER on his way home.. I would feel more comfortable using those since they pick up the smallest amounts of hcg  and lets be honest.. faint lines are scary in the world of IF...

So he picked me up some digital ones... Ugh! I'll try again tomorrow and Tuesday before beta.
Here is my super faint line... FX'd, praying, wishing, bargaining, selling my soul that this one sticks...