Thursday, June 19, 2014

Today Sucks.. Let Me Count the Ways

Every have such a bad day you're afraid to complain because there are more hours in the day- which means there are more things could happen? Yup.. that's where I am.
So lets recap

1. I got my period today. Not such a bad thing- but holy cramps! I even took tylenol- and I hate taking more pills.

2. Work sucked. I had 1,000 things to do and teachers kept leaving me kids that were not my responsibility. And I am so behind in my classroom and grading- but everyone else is all set.

3. It took over 7 phone calls, 2 days, and about 3 hours to schedule an HSG. I did not think this was too big a deal. I tried calling yesterday to be ahead of the game. But the scheduling dept didn't call me back. I called 2x today and they didn't call me. I told my nurse and told her I would try somewhere else. Other places were booked.. I finally tried a hospital on the way to work and they were available. I told my nurse and she told me that I can't go there because patients complain it's very painful there and they do not do it correctly and it may need to be done over. OK- so that's a good reason. I finally got a larger list of places approved to call- but at that point every place was closed. Then at 6:30 the original place I was trying to get into called me.. so that was resolved- but it didn't help the day. I mean- those 7 phone calls didn't even include the calls and emails to my nurse.

4. My RE didn't call me back. My therapist said I should write him and have him call me so I can discuss my questions. Clearly I have anxiety issues with this upcoming cycle. I admit, I hate being clueless, feeling out of the loop and no clue what is going on. Only thing is, he didn't call me. He give me a bullshit response that was vague. Said we could delay based on CD3 bloodwork. Delay the IUI? Taking the estrogen? The HSG? I wasn't sure because it was a vague e-mail. and that lead into...

5. DH and I kinda had a tiff. I asked him about RE's email and he said it wasn't confusing at all. but he couldn't answer that question either. So I was clearly hormonal and pissy and DH said he would write him and ask him all the questions. Well- he wasn't kidding.. He asked why we needed an HSG, what it does, what the estrogen does and a whole bunch of questions that well- I already knew the answer to. (But I am grateful that he is trying)

6. DH can't come to monitoring on Saturday. I really feel overwhelmed and it's hard to keep doing this alone.

7. My sister had surgery today. Clearly, more sucky for her. But since she stays with my aunt and I don't speak to my aunt, I couldn't go to. I kept my phone on all day hoping to hear from her or the doctor. Luckily, she is doing ok and is home resting.

8. The dog stole one of my toys. Not a big deal, but it was one with those stupid plastic beans... Ugh! I see more vacuuming in my future.

9. My friend texted me from school and completely reminded me I never filed for financial aid! Ugh! That was due months ago. I'll have to do that this weekend.

10. I can't send my bloodwork to Dr. KK because it has to be drawn on CD 1-3 and has to be shipped via FedEx by Thursday. Umm.. I got my period at noon. How the heck with everything else was I going to get DH to draw my blood (I didn't even have the tubes or packing slips) and out in 4 hours. Really?? Guess that isn't happening this cycle.

11. My friend from school told me that we can't take out extra money in our financial aid anymore. I know it may seem wrong- but after my mom's death and paying for the funeral, we were relying on the extra from financial aid or my sister paying us back for half the funeral in order to pay for our next IVF cycle. Or I could use the fake money I got from my nonexistent contract - Wishing for my retro check to come soon and a contract signed even sooner.

I don't know- maybe this is how it's supposed to go. My stomach had been killing me with all the pills and I've been thinking that maybe I need to look into having surgery on my stomach before having a baby. I mean- if we don't have the money and need to wait years- what else can I do.. but I can't help but feel like I've wasted all my time with Dr. KK if I have to start over again.

How can I be on this road for 5 years and be in the same spot as I began, except with even more crap buried on top of me?


  1. What a crappy day :( I hope tomorrow brings a bit more sunshine your way. I don't understand why anyone has to go through this let alone why it had to be us. Sending hugs!

    1. It did, I got notice we got a contract. FX'd it includes retro.
      Thanks for the hugs and sending big ones back! ((HUGS))